I have a lot to get to this morning. Especially since I have to book Rochester (my hometown) and head back up to Hudson to work at Menards, the store of champions, at 4:00, but I thought I'd share some opinions.
Monday Night Football: Dear Green Bay Packers, Your team is absolute dogshit. Can you please teach your field goal unit how to block. Your sworn enemy, Crishad. The only thing that was proven Monday night was that God's hatred for the Vikings outweighs his love for the Packers. Even if the Packers had buried that field goal, there would have been too much irony for the moment as Adrian Peterson of the Bears was called for a horse collar tackle that put them into field goal postition. Even more so, the coin toss didn't even go the Vikings way as the coin hit Brian Urlacher as it was coming down. I thought you had to reflip after that but apparently not. You could even see Urlacher's stupid smile as he ran off the field saying "we get the football!" Ugh. Bottom line is, the Vikings must win Sunday vs. New York. There are some things going for them, but I'll get into that later in the week.
Wild Blockbuster Trade? Get ready for the Marian Gaborik rumor wheel to start spinning. The Toronto Sun reported this morning that Doug Reisbrough has approached Atlanta Thrashers GM Dan Waddell about Marian Gaborik. The rumored deal would send Gabby and Kim Johnsson to Atlanta for Ilya Kovalchuk and Colby Armstrong. Um, yes please! All of this supposedly hinges on Gaborik signing a long term deal with the Thrashers. One could argue that Kovalchuk would not have success in Minnesota because of Jacque Lemaire's system, but here's the big principle. Kovalchuk stays healthy. He has played all 82 games in the majority of his seasons as a Thrasher. This trade would be huge, but it's just a rumor.
Mauer watch begins: The Pioneer Press reported this morning that the Boston Red Sox has have started jerking off and throwing money at Joe Mauer's picture. Mauer can become a free agent in 2011 and of the Sox don't land Mark Teixiera, they'll most likely wait to get Mauer in 2011. This makes sense because Jason Varitek is really old and the Twins are incredibly cheap. Want proof? We've signed NICK PUNTO so far this offseason. Merry Christmas Twins fans! Where this doesn't make sense is that we're talking about Joe Mauer. Let's take a look at the reasons why Joe Mauer should stay in Minnesota. First, every woman in Minnesota wants to use his sideburns as runways. Seriously, Joe Mauer is the biggest sex symbol in Minnesota. I'm serious here. Anytime you talk to any woman in Minnesota and they are a Twins fan, they say their favorite player is Joe Mauer and then they say how they are his future wife. The other reason is that he grew up a Twins fan. There was a story that he locked himself in a room when he wasn't allowed to watch one of the World Series games in 1991 for bad behavior. He's as diehard of a Twins fan as any other fan in the state. Third, his buddy Justin Morneau is locked up for five more years. Fourth, there's a new stadium coming that Mauer will be the starting catcher on opening day. OK, do you need any more proof? I think Mauer is the Kirby Puckett type in that he'll take less money to be a Twin than more money to be a Red Sox (Sock? Um...)
Enjoy the Christmas rush people. I might jump back on soon with a symbol of Christmas Cheer...or jeer.
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