Let's jump into a time machine for a second. It's Valentines Day back when I was in first grade. I'm sure everyone did the same thing for Valentines Day back in elementary school. I would go with my parents and get the NFL quarterback club valentines and hand them out throughout the class and stuff candy in the envelopes. I'm pretty sure none of the girls in my class appreciated getting a Warren Moon valentine, but I digress. While all of these people happily munched on their candy, I turned over my bag and one valentine fell out. That would be the one I made for myself. Hey, I like candy too! Unfortunatly, one of my classmates would scream "THAT'S NOT FAIR!" and I would respond "Well, where is mine?" I guess she forgot about my name on the list. Figures.
Flash forward to 2010. Sunday will mark Valentines Day, the worst holiday in the history of holidays. For those of you who don't know, several Saints named Valentine died and now we have to buy chocolate, diamonds, and other special things for our loved ones. People go nuts over this and there is so much pressure. If you don't push the right button on Valentines Day, you might as well go straight to the doghouse.
It doesn't make sense to me on so many levels. Yes, I have never been in a relationship, but look at it this way. When you buy your loved one a Valentines Day gift, you're giving her a gift on a day where EVERYONE gets a gift. Why not surprise her? I mean, do something for Valentines Day, but I'm sure it means more if you randomly bought her flowers on April 4th or something. (For that paragraph, I would like to personally thank my relationship advisor Jenna Nelson, who hopefully doesn't mind being mentioned in this entry.)
Bottom line is this, what do singles have to do on Valentines Day? You may think that I'm going to save some cash by not buying a gift. WRONG! What will happen is that I will want to be in pain on Valentines Day, so I'll go out the night before and drink more than I can chew. After the liquor starts flowing, I'll start talking about how horrible Valentines Day, and I'll go to a girl. I'll start buying said girl shot after shot, probably equaling the total of the gift that you're giving your special someone. The one benefit to your situation is that you know you'll be going home with the person your giving your gift to. Me? Not so much.
Heck, I might as well polish of a couple Long Islands, back them up with some Bloody Marys and then get a table for one at a reasonable establishment and scream at random couples. Yup, I don't like February 14th that much. The only good thing about February 14th is that we are just 2 months away from National Crishad Appreciation Day!
So I hope that you and your special someone have a wonderful Valentines Day. I will be in as much pain as I would be watching the NBA All-Star game. Wait...THEY'RE ON THE SAME DAY??? @#$%!
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