Tuesday, May 31, 2011

LFFL Weekly Special Edition: Schad Goes Ballistic

The LFFL may be locked out, but that didn't keep The Crishad Experience owner from breaking his silence after not commenting since The Renaissance Man destroyed TCE in Libsmo Bowl I.

There were several topics that Schad tackled in his no holds barred interview. On his loss to TRM, Schad said that while Nelson's team deserved the championship, it's "my f@#$ing destiny" to win Libsmo Bowl II.

"I surprised myself that the team played as well as it did, but with that said, I have to be considered the favorite coming into this year. I have a running back that has the most potential of any running back in the LFFL. I have the fantasy wrecking ball known as Michael Vick or "Mr. I-can-drop-40-without-breaking-a-sweat" as I called him."

Yeah, I didn't laugh at that one either.

"There are a lot of solid cores in the league and there will be good teams this year. You think Linzy's Losers are going to be terrible again? You think Cassie will be running Brehmer's team again? Oh, that's not confirmed...don't write that!"

(Yeah, too late you arrogant jackass)

But Schad's ire really grew when he mentioned Rob Silvers. According to unpublished reports, Schad and Silvers have agreed to call next years rivalry matchup the "Express Bowl" in Silvers scoring a broadcasting job with the Eau Claire Express baseball team.

"Good for Rob." Schad said. "He works hard at his craft and it's good to see a fellow WRFW'er land a broadcasting job."

But Schad is now subleasing for Silver's room, and found out one small detail.

"No ESPN or any other sports related channels? How am I supposed to know what's going on? I think this is something Silvers thought of and was an evil plan to make me drop the Express Bowl next year. Well, I'm coming for Mr. Silvers and the rest of the LFFL as soon as this frickin lockout ends."

About that...

"Roger Goodell...you look like Harvey Dent, and you dive into your money like Scrooge McDuck...you're a @#$%. DeMaurice Smith...your hat sucks...same feelings about you as well. Sit down and get this done, because if I take some hard liquor, the second coming of John Cena is coming through that door and causing some absolute carnage. Drew Brees, Jeff Saturday, even Jesus Christ himself Aaron Rodgers? I will destroy them all if I go into 'You can't see me' mode. That's a fact."

So to recap, Chris Schad is as loud, arrogant, and foul-mouthed as ever as the LFFL continues to be locked out. One can only imagine how it would be possible for this man to survive without fantasy football. Glad I'm not that asshole...

- Ricardo Rodriguez, Rochester Post Bulletin

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